It's the first place I saw in the Dominican Republic, and as I walked through its doors I caught a glimpse of my future for the first time. It's the place I have felt almost every emotion I can imagine-joy, frustration, giddiness, hopelessness. And it's the place where my adventure as a missionary started just one year ago.
As I walked through my beloved airport this time around I thought back to last year and how I was feeling as I began my journey. I can chuckle sagely now at my foolishness and uncertainty. Back then there were times I thought the loneliness and despair would overcome me. But my God overcame them for me, and in the process helped me discover more about myself and where He is leading me.
It's funny, because people tend to put missionaries on a special pedestal, the "extra holy" pedestal. Missionaries are the super-Christians, the ones who will sacrifice it all in the name of the Lord and His work. In reality, my first year as a missionary forced me to look at myself for what I really am-broken and human. The mission field will demand everything from you and it makes the best and worst of yourself emerge and parade around, sometimes for everyone to see. I didn't know I had a temper until I lost it over and over again. I have cursed more in the past year than in all the years before combined, and I've never wanted a drink more in my entire life. But I have also gained more wisdom, showed more love, and been more loved than I can ever express.
Just for kicks I asked myself to reflect on the past year and pick the most important lessons I have learned about working in the mission field. Maybe they will be interesting for you. Maybe they will help aspiring missionaries, or maybe they will have no effect at all. But I worked hard, suffered long, and enjoyed myself immensely in order to learn these lessons, so for no other person's sake than my own, I put them here for you to read (in no particular order):
1. Don't be a hero.
Sometimes it's hard to distinguish between work and recreation times. As a missionary, you are basically always "on." There aren't many places where you can be a missionary for eight hours a day and then go enjoy family board game night in the privacy of your own home. People will always be seeking you, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But you have to know your limits. God did not design us to give everything we've got 24 hours a day. He designed us with a need for rest. Figure out a balance between work and rest and then try to stick to it the best you can. And don't feel bad if you don't find yourself teaching a local how to garden or holding a child's hand all the time! Last year I would occasionally (or quite often) have to turn children away who wanted to play because I was at my breaking point and just needed time to myself. I would go back to my room and turn on a movie or take a nap, and I would spend the next half an hour mentally convincing myself to stop feeling bad, because I needed this. Now I am a lot more comfortable taking care of myself. I deserve a movie day every now and then, dangit! And I will be much better equipped to give my all to those kids tomorrow.
2. Recognize your place in God's history.
This might come off as a negative thing, but it's actually something that's quite humbling and exciting to think about. God has been working in humans' lives since He created them, and He has also given humans the great privilege of helping Him in His work. That being said, we need to remember that we are not the first people He has sent out into the world to try and do good. Unless you are called to work with an unreached people group (and they do still exist) then chances are a past missionary has tread the path you are now on. When I moved to the DR I did not boldly go where no man has gone before. In fact, I quite timidly went where many people have gone before. To think that I am the first or or the best missionary these people have ever seen is just foolish. We can't forget our past; and why should we want to? We don't have to reinvent the wheel. Listen to history teaching you. Learn from our past brothers and sisters' mistakes and triumphs, and build from the foundation they have given us. You are a small link in a long chain of God's people. Get excited about the part you are playing in the large drama of human history.
3. Find a cheerleader.
Some days here are difficult. Some days you may wonder why you are even trying at all. Some days it may seem like you have made absolutely no impact on the people around you. And on those days you need a cheerleader. Maybe you can go out and find one but I think they usually find their way to you. A cheerleader is a person who thinks you are great (which you are!). That person will be there for you at your lowest moments to remind you that you are doing alright, and that there is a purpose in the difficult times. A cheerleader may not even know you need encouragement, but that's what makes them so wonderful.
Last year I was blessed to have two cheerleaders, one Dominican and one American. God knows I had some rough days. I began to wonder if all my effort was for nothing. I was so discouraged that I could have sat in my room all day and cried. And without fail one or both of my cheerleaders would send me an encouraging message or tell me that I was on the right track. They absolutely never knew that I was so down and so desperately needed their uplifting words. God is awesome like that. They also probably don't know that I consider them my cheerleaders and would probably be surprised that their words meant so much to me. I won't share their names with you because it might embarrass them and they also don't do anything for the sake of recognition. But one day I will tell them both how God used them in such a big way to keep me going.
Every missionary needs a cheerleader. To show them truth when they can't see it.
4. Dream big but think long.
I have filled hours of the day just dreaming about the plans I have for my time here. But a hard lesson to learn is that dreams take a long time to achieve, especially in the setting of a developing country. Around here you can't measure your time by daily to-do lists; you are lucky to accomplish one thing you set out to do that day. Instead you have to measure progress monthly, even yearly. There were so many days when I questioned if I was making any progress at all. Today looking back I can see just how far we have come, not only as a family, but in our ministry as well. I am so proud of what we have achieved in a year's time-but I couldn't see it when I was living it every single day. So don't let the daily drudgery discourage you from dreaming; you are going somewhere, I promise. Just be ready to wait. And believe me, it's worth it.
5. Don't sacrifice your relationship with God in the name of helping others.
This is a point that I cannot stress enough. As a missionary the temptation is there to focus more on the people around you instead of making time to spend with God. But it looks good and seems kind of right, so we don't question it enough. Should I read my Bible and take some time to pray for my day or should I jump right in and get some things done that I didn't finish yesterday? Should I tell these kids to come back later because I'm having some quiet time or should I tell God to wait while I go play? These are tough choices, and there are moments when your time with God will be interrupted by a pressing matter. But the point is to make sure you are not continually choosing to serve humans while neglecting your God. You need time with Him to fill you up so that you will be better equipped to love the people around you. This is a lesson I struggle with daily, and it takes discipline, but to ignore your need for God is basically a direct route to exhaustion and burnout.
So there you have it. I have now passed on my little nuggets of wisdom to you. I hope they prove helpful for you. And if not, I should have a fresh batch of wisdom ready by the end of next year :)
Cheers to a new year!
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